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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22483342">Retribution</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/abbyscameron/pseuds/abbyscameron'>abbyscameron</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Dark Artifices Series - Cassandra Clare</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Castle AU, Detective AU, Emma is the cop, F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-01-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 07:27:00</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>16,804</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22483342</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/abbyscameron/pseuds/abbyscameron</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It'd been months since she delved into her parent's cold case. That was the case she'd been drowning in since her rookie days. That case was the reason she became a cop in the first place and she let it consume her to unhealthy proportions. It took everything in her to finally let it go before she hit rock bottom and couldn't get out again.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Emma Carstairs &amp; Cristina Rosales, Julian Blackthorn/Emma Carstairs</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emma sighed and leaned back in her chair, stretching her arms above her head. It had been a long and boring day. The only thing she was working on was just mindless paperwork, and she was going stir crazy being stuck in the precinct all day.</p><p>She almost wished someone would get killed, as bad as that sounded. <em>Just </em>so she could have an active case. Just so she could get outside, boots on the ground. Away from this damn desk.</p><p>“Careful, you’ll fall and hit your head.” One of the detectives calls from across the bullpen.</p><p>“At least that would get me out of here,” Emma called back, leaning forward to allow her chair to hit the ground. She ran a hand over her face and stifled a yawn. Emma never knew why doing paperwork took so much out of her, but she hated it.</p><p>“What about that cold case of yours?”</p><p>Emma’s head snapped towards him and her eyes narrowed just the slightest. “That’s done.”</p><p>“Cracked it, have you?” She could hear the cheek in his voice and felt her blood boil.</p><p>“It’s done,” Emma said again, more firmly this time.</p><p>It had been months since she delved into her parent’s cold case. That was the case she had been drowning in since her rookie days. That case was the reason she became a cop in the first place, and she let it consume her to unhealthy proportions. It took <em>everything</em> in her to finally let it go before she hit rock bottom and couldn’t get out again.</p><p>The entire precinct knew about the case and her ties to it; but very few ever mentioned it to her. Or made jokes about it. Most knew better.</p><p>“Right, my bad.”</p><p>“If you must know,” Emma said, through gritted teeth. “I’ve put that particular case behind me. It was dead end after dead end. It was going nowhere.”</p><p>That case nearly destroyed her, consumed every factor of her life.</p><p>There was even a time while she was in the academy that the inside of her wardrobe was her makeshift crime board. Her former best friend called it her “wall of crazy.” To this day, she still doesn’t know where she got the strength to take it down and box it away.</p><p>
  <em>Just like the detectives did…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Put her parents murder case into a tiny little box and shoved it away. </em>
</p><p>She can still remember that day as clearly as if it had just happened. The day the officer knocked on the door of the Blackthorns, when she was nineteen years old, and informed her that they were giving up.</p><p><em>Gang violence,</em> they said. <em>It’s getting worse in the city. </em></p><p>That’s all it was to detectives who clearly didn’t care enough to think outside the box.</p><p>Though Emma knew, deep down in her soul, that wasn’t it. There was something more to her parent’s murder, and she knew that somewhere, her parent’s murderer was still out there.</p><p>At the end of that summer, she joined the police academy, got her own place and never looked back. As much as she loved the Blackthorns and appreciated all they did for her, it was much too painful to stay in the area. To be reminded of the loss of her parents, day in, day out.</p><p>She had only really talked to Julian after she moved out. He was even there when she graduated from the academy. Though once she threw herself into her work – becoming the youngest woman to make detective in the entire LAPD, and got sucked into her parent’s case, they kind of lost touch.</p><p>She hadn’t spoken to any of them since.</p><p>Though Emma had been known to pick up one of Julian’s books from time to time. She never would have thought Julian would have become a successful author. She had always pegged artist.</p><p>“Carstairs!”</p><p>Emma is broken out of her reverie by Diana’s shout and turned her head to look at her. “We got a case.”</p><hr/><p>“Are you okay?”</p><p>“Yeah, I’m fine. Why do you ask?” Emma responded as they stopped at a red light. She turned towards Cristina and saw the concerned look on the other woman’s face.</p><p>“You just seemed…out of it earlier,” Cristina said. “And with Lockwood bringing up what he did. I just wanted to check in.”</p><p>Emma nodded and pressed on the gas as the light changed. “Yeah, I’m good. Or as good as I can be – I just fell into my head for a little bit. I don’t think it’ll ever get easier.”</p><p>“I know you know this, and you’re probably tired bringing it up. But eventually you’re going to have to deal with it; or find a way to learn to live with it.”</p><p>“No, you’ve just shoved the memories and the pain into a little box and threw away the key.”</p><p>Emma sighed They’d only been partners for a couple of months now; but somehow Cristina knew her so well already. Cristina was also the first person to call Emma out on her shit when she needed it.</p><p>Emma parked the cruiser at the curb and cut the engine. “I hate it when you’re right.”</p><p>Cristina placed a comforting hand on her arm. “I just care about your wellbeing and don’t want to see you drowning in emotions.”</p><p>“And I appreciate you, I do. I’m just fucking stubborn.”</p><p>Cristina laughed. “Oh, I’m well aware of that. Don’t you worry… Now let’s get to this crime scene before they think we got lost.”</p><hr/><p>Emma stopped at the edge of the ally, staring down at their victim and felt the breath as it left her. She knew exactly who he was.</p><p>“Emma, are you alright?” She barely heard Cristina ask.</p><p>Emma shook her head and took a step backwards, leaning against the side of the building for support. “I know him… he’s a lot older than the last time I saw him; but it’s <em>him.” </em></p><p>Cristina stopped next to her. “Who?”</p><p>“His name is Andrew Blackthorn,” she responded at almost the same time one of the CSU techs called out the same information from a wallet pulled from the body. “He was… he um, he took me in for a bit after my parents were killed when I had nowhere else to go.”</p><p>She turned back to look at Cristina. “He’s my former best friend’s father… I haven’t seen any of the family in ten years. Not since I joined the academy and we lost touch.”</p><p>What was worse about the scene wasn’t that it was Andrew. It was that the crime scene was eerily similar to her parents’. The stab wounds, the slump of the body near the trash. She knew it was little details and a bit of a stretch to compare; but she was sure of it. She’d remember them anywhere; it was as if they were seared into her memory.</p><p>Which means that whoever had killed Andrew, had also murdered her parents.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emma pulled a whiteboard from a backroom once they got back to the precinct. She and Cristina set to work, mapping out the case. Emma taped a picture of Andrew and wrote all his information under the photo; while Cristina set to work with the crime scene photos. As well as the photos from the morgue.</p><p>“Are you sure it’s the same person?” Cristina asked, stepping back from the whiteboard.</p><p><br/>Emma nodded. “Trust me, Cristina… The crime scene, the dumping. And now that we’ve seen the wounds up close on the body. The similarities are too striking for it to not be the same killer.”</p><p><br/>“I just can’t wrap my head around why whoever did it would wait ten years between murders.”</p><p><br/>Emma sighed and leaned back in her chair, stretching her arms over her head. “Yeah, that’s the part that doesn’t make any damn sense.”</p><p><br/>Cristina glanced away from the board and towards their captain’s office. “Do you think you should tell her?”</p><p><br/>Emma ran a hand over her head and let out a breath. “Diana will no doubt kick me off the case and I’ll die if that happens.”</p><p><br/>“You would probably just get stuck back on paperwork duty,” Cristina responded, with another glance back.</p><p><br/>“Exactly, Cristina!” Emma cried, throwing her hands in the air. “I’ll literally die of boredom and you’ll be dragging my dead body down to the morgue!”</p><p><br/>“There’s no need to be that dramatic, Carstairs,” Cristina laughed. “But that is only if she does kick you off.”</p><p><br/>Emma raised an eyebrow. “I’m sure she would. Any Captain would, it’s kind of in the book that they have to if you’re too close to a case.”</p><p><br/>“I don’t think so,” Cristina told her, shaking her head. “At least not at first. She might give you a chance to prove that you can distance yourself from it before kicking you off, especially if you tell her first. Though one wrong move and she wouldn’t think twice about benching you.”</p><p><br/>Emma steeled herself and pushed back from her desk. “You know, I’m hope you’re right about this. But either way, whether she benches me or not, I’m not going to stop investigating.”</p><p><br/>“I know,” Cristina winked. “Which is why you have me to keep you in check. Because lord knows you’re going to need it.”</p><p><br/>Emma stuck her tongue out and stood up. She crossed the bullpen and knocked on her captain’s door. “Can we talk?”</p><p><br/>Diana looked up from her desk and her paperwork. “Yes, Carstairs?”</p><p><br/>Emma took a deep breath to ready herself. “It’s about the case… It’s not really a lead but we – or I found a possible connection to a cold case.”</p><p><br/>Diana didn’t respond, just raised an eyebrow, prompting Emma to continue.</p><p><br/>“The case in question…. well it’s my parent’s case.”</p><p><br/>“I see,” Diana said, putting down her pen and glancing up at Emma, giving her full attention. She crossed her hands and leaned forward. “And you’re positive it’s the same person?”</p><p><br/>“I recognize the similarities, yes,” Emma told her, not wanting to give away too much; but still wanting to be truthful.</p><p><br/>“Because you were so deep in their case when you first started,” Diana corrected. “Don’t be surprised that I know things,” she added at Emma’s confused look. “I’ve kept an eye on you ever since you walked into my precinct. Ever since you walked into the Academy more like and I wished you would change your mind.”</p><p><br/>Emma was only mildly confused. “Why?”</p><p><br/>Diana sighed. “I knew your parents, Emma. I know what happened to them, what happened to their case. I didn’t want it to control your life and I hoped that you wouldn’t get sucked into this life.”</p><p><br/>Emma glanced down at her feet, not wanting to look at Diana anymore.</p><p><br/>“But I’ve watched you grow into an amazing detective,” Diana complemented. “You’ve really come into your own and made a spot for yourself here. It’s almost as if you were made for this life.”</p><p><br/>Emma looked back up. “You really knew my parents?”</p><p><br/>Diana nodded. “I did. They were great people, even better detectives from what I’ve heard. So, I’ve felt like I owed it to them to try and keep you safe in any way that I can.”</p><p><br/>A moment of silence passed between the two as the information sunk in. Emma couldn’t wrap her head around the fact that her parents knew her captain. Of course, back then, Diana would have just been a detective.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>Guess it makes sense for an attorney to know detectives…</em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>Yet Diana makes it sound like there was more to it.</em>
</p><p><br/>“So, what about the case?” Emma asked, pressing for more, wishing Diana would just rip the band aid.</p><p><br/>“You do realize that if this is true, I should take you off this case,” Diana started, putting up a hand to stop Emma’s rebuttal. “But I also realize that you’re my best detective. Aside from Rosales and you came to me with this information instead of letting me find out on my own. I’m also aware that you would just investigate on your own if I did kick you off. So, if – and only if – you’re on your best behavior, I will keep you on the case.”</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>Why does Diana know me so damn well?</em>
</p><p><br/>Emma pursed her lips. “Why do I sense a but coming?”</p><p><br/>“I expect consistent updates from you. And any major decisions pertaining to the case have to go through me. I just don’t want your emotions leading your actions. It’ll also be best for everyone involved. 1PP won’t be happy if you go off the rails on this and they figure out why.”</p><p><br/>Emma nodded. “Yes ma’am.”</p><p><br/>“I’m sure you’ll follow through. And I’m sure that even if you don’t, Rosales out there will make sure you do.”</p><p><br/>“Yes ma’am,” Emma repeated, moving towards the door. “I appreciate this, captain.”</p><p><br/>“Just don’t make me regret this decision.”</p><hr/><p>
  <em>Diana knew my parents….</em>
</p><p><br/>For some reason, Emma couldn’t wrap her head around that and she couldn’t figure out why it was bugging her so much. Maybe it was because she’d never heard her parents mention Diana and Emma had never seen the older woman around either. Though that could just have meant that they weren’t close.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <em>But the way Diana made it sound…</em>
</p><p><br/>She broke out of her reverie by a pen being thrown at her. She glanced over to look at Cristina and raised a brow.</p><p><br/>“Now you pay attention.”</p><p><br/>“What?”</p><p><br/>“You got lost in your head, again,” Cristina said, reaching out a hand. “Now give me my pen back.”</p><p><br/>“You threw it at me, your loss,” Emma tossed back, picking up the pen and sticking it in her pen holder. “I was just thinking about something Diana said.”</p><p><br/>“Are you off the case?”</p><p><br/>Emma rolled her eyes. “No, you were right. Like always… she’s letting me stay on. I just have to be on my best behavior. But that’s not what I was thinking about. Apparently, Diana knew my parents and I can’t wrap my head around it.”</p><p><br/>“What’s so strange about it?”</p><p><br/>“My parents never mentioned her, I never even saw her until I came to this precinct.”</p><p><br/>“Is it that big of a stretch?” Cristina began. “I mean, your parents were attorney’s. It’s not weird to think that they knew of each other. They could have tried cases Diana was just a part of.”</p><p><br/>Though that guilt in Diana’s voice…</p><p><br/>Emma shrugged. “Maybe. Maybe I’m just thinking too deep into it. Like I always do. But there’s just something in my gut that’s telling me there’s something more.”</p><p><br/>“And you’ll have all the time in the world to think through that; but it’s probably just going to drive you insane.”</p><p><br/>Emma picked up the pen that Cristina threw and threw it back at her. “Stop being right all the time.”</p><p><br/>Cristina laughed. “Come on, Carstairs. We both know that can’t happen.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Emma and Cristina sat at their desk, eating the take out food they're ordered. Mostly at Emma's insistence because she was starving. Though if she was being completely honest with herself, Emma was always hungry. </p><p>
  <em>"How do you manage to eat so much and yet stay so skinny?" Cristina had asked one day. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Emma had just shrugged. "I was blessed with a fast acting metabolism." Though she knew all of her mile morning runs along the beach probably had a lot of help in the matter too. </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“So I’ll have some of the uniforms start getting phone records and see if we can track down any of Andrew’s children,” Cristina said, glancing behind her. “See if any of them still live in the area?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh I’m sure they all still live around,” Emma responded, shoveling fried rice into her mouth. “The Blackthorns are just a close knit family. They’d want to stay close.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was well aware of just how close the family was. Sometimes she often wondered </span>
  <em>
    <span>how</span>
  </em>
  <span>. There never even seemed to be disagreements or arguments. She never remembered seeing them yelling at each other, or arguing. They were closer than any other family she had ever known. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She never knew how, what with that many people in a house at any given time. It just didn’t seem real. Though, she knew, the Blackthorns were one in a million. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They had even included her into their family with no hesitation. They always treated her like one of their own ever since she met Jules and he introduced her to them. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She remembered baking with Helen, video games with Mark, computers with Livvy, whatever new thing Ty was obsessed with at the moment, horror movies with Dru and really any random book, game or stuffed creature Tavvvy brought her...</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She remembered everything about the Blackthorns, no matter how much she'd tried to push everything away. And she had, shoved it deep down into the depths of her mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Then this damn case came by and dragged everything up again. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Holy shit, Tavvy would be old enough to be in college.</span>
  </em>
  <span> The thought hit her like a train, knocking the breath out of her and she braced her hands on her desk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma?” Cristina's concerned voice called. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She dropped her hands to her side and glanced up. "</span>
  <span>Just remembering that their youngest would be about 20,” Emma let out a breath and tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “The last time I saw him, he was like 10.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina reached out a hand and gave Emma’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Are you sure you can do this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded. “Yeah...it may just be a little weird and awkward at first. Might just dredge up some feelings I’m not going to like or want to deal with.” </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>“So you were right,” Cristina said, walking back to her desk. “All of the Blackthorns stayed local and the oldest three are on their way to the precinct.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And the rest didn’t answer,” Emma added, leaning back. “But I think, or I hope, the uniforms left a message of some sort...You can stop looking at me like that, Cristina, I’m fine.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina just raised an eyebrow. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed. “Aright, fine, maybe I’m a little nervous about seeing Julian again. Or really any of them because that was a time of my life that I’d rather not go back to.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t have to do any of the interviewing if you don’t think you can.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No, it’s fine. I can do it,” Emma steeled herself. “I’ll take Julian.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you’re sure.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She wasn’t; but she was damn sure going to do it anyway. She was probably most likely going to regret the decision; but she was a detective for crying out loud. She couldn’t let nerves or unsureness keep her from doing her job.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>What kind of detective would she be if she did?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She just wasn't prepared for the sight of Julian Blackthorn walking off the elevator and into her precinct. Their eyes met across the bullpen and Emma felt the breath leave her for the second time that day. It was almost as if she were nineteen again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He looked almost the same as he had ten years ago. Though now there was more shadows under his eyes, a hardness to his gaze, his features and the remains of a five o'clock shadow along his jaw. A much more profound jawline. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He was defeated, she could easily tell despite the years they've spent apart. She knew him just as well as she knew herself. Besides, she's been in his shoes before. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She tuned away, sighed and grabbed her hair to put it into a ponytail to give her hands something to do. A distraction. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>This definitely was not going to be an easy interview. What the fuck did she get herself into?</span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I just wanted to add a quick note to say that I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy throughout everything! Hopefully we can all go back to our normal routines soon.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Chapter 4</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>well, um, this chapter kind of hurt me even to write, so I apologize in advance if it too hurts you</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Emma?”</p><p>Emma didn’t bat an eye as she closed the interview room door behind her. Better not to let recognition flash in her eyes; it was best to keep her emotions in check. </p><p>She never thought she’d ever see her childhood best friend again - not after they fell apart. Though, she knew there was no way around it since she was investigating his father’s murder. </p><p><em> You shouldn’t even be on this case anymore </em>, she told herself. And she knew, once the connection to her parents murder or her connection to the Blackthorns came to light and her captian found out, she would be kicked off. </p><p>She sighed, why couldn’t she have agreed to interview one of the other Blackthorns. Helen? Mark? Livvy? Ty? Dru? Or even Tavvy? </p><p>“It’s Detective Carstairs,” she responded, keeping the professionalism in her tone as she took a seat in the chair across from the couch that Julian perched on. “I’m sure you know why you’re here.” </p><p>“Because someone murdered my father...I hope you don’t think it was one of us.” His tone is just as clipped as her own. Emma can almost see the wall going up. </p><p>“If any of you were actual suspects, we’d be having this conversation in an interrogation room,” she told him, flipping open the manila folder she carried with her. “As it is, there are some weird coincidences that could be found suspicious.” . </p><p>“Like?”</p><p>“The similarities between your father’s body and crime scene and those in your first published book,” she rattled off, sliding a picture of the book cover across the table. “I hope you can picture it without all the gory details.” </p><p>There’s a breath of silence between them as Julian’s gaze flips between the book photo and Emma. She silently cursed herself as she watched the pieces come together in Julian’s mind. </p><p>“Wouldn’t it be more similar to your parents than fiction?”</p><p>Emma let out a breath and tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear. She knew back then that she shouldn’t have shared such little details of a police case to a civilian; but she was glad to have someone to talk to, to share it with. Until she pushed him away, that is. </p><p>“No one else on the squad as put the pieces together, <em> yet. </em>” </p><p>“Because no one else was as deeply attached to that case as you were,” he said it so simply because even after all these years, he knows her so well. </p><p><em> If only you knew just how much </em>. </p><p>“You wrote about me.” She doesn’t know why she said it, it just slipped out and there was no taking it back now. </p><p>“You <em> inspired </em> Elizabeth Townsend, sure; but that doesn’t mean it’s about you.” </p><p>Emma stopped herself from rolling her eyes, she knows he’s been cheeky on purpose. This back and forth thing was completely <em> them </em>, an old dance that was normal for them. It almost as if the last ten years apart never happened. </p><p>“Blond, kickass female becomes a cop after her parents were murdered and they never found the killer,” she recited, ticking off her fingers. “Yep, definitely not me.”</p><p>“Maybe it was just my way of trying to keep a part of you with me,” he tossed back. “Since you just left and we never saw you again.” </p><p>Emma closed her eyes. “I needed space.” </p><p>“And I would have <em> gave </em> it to you! I would have given you anything you needed,” Julian sounded desperate now and Emma’s resolve chipped. </p><p>“I just needed the time to grieve and to deal on my own,” she said, the excuse flowing easily off her tongue even know she knows she hasn’t dealt with it. Not really.</p><p>
  <em> Damn Cristina.  </em>
</p><p>“It’s been ten years, Emma. Ten fucking years.” </p><p>“It was too fucking painful, okay,” Emma had to keep herself from screaming across the space, she didn’t want to draw too much attention from the rest of the detectives on the floor. “I had to put it all behind me to move on.” </p><p>“Just like it was painful for me, watching my mother slowly dying,” Julian spat out. “I had to watch my mother go through so much pain as the cancer racked her body. I had to explain to my little brother why mommy was so sick and why she wasn’t getting better. Tavvy just didn’t understand. I mean what ten year old has a grasp of stage four cancer?” </p><p>Emma’s resolve broke, shattered into a million pieces like the mirror she punched when the detectives gave her the news about her parents. She sat there, gobsmacked as Julian rattled the news of the past ten years off. She felt like someone had punched her in the gut. All this stuff was happening to her best friend, to his family - who at one point was a second family to her. And she was so selfish that she never knew. </p><p>“I had no idea..” </p><p>“Because you <em> left </em>.”</p><p>The words just twisted the knife that much deeper. She took a moment to collect herself, trying to shove Emma Carstairs down into a box. Right now, she needed calm, cool and collected Detective Carstairs to get the job down. </p><p>She couldn’t let her emotions cloud her judgement. There’d be time for that later. </p><p>“We definitely got off track here,” she started, clicking her pen. “Now do you know of anyone who would want to hurt your dad? Any enemies?”</p><p>Julian scoffed and leaned back into the couch cushion. “Everyone loved dad. I have no idea who could have done it, any more than I know who did your parents; but whoever it is, it has to be one and the same.”</p><p>Emma took her pocketbook out, flipped to a clean page and scribbled <em> no known enemies? </em></p><p>“What about known acquaintance?”</p><p>“Ansel, literally anyone in the law firm, and you’d know that if you kept in touch.” </p><p>“I have to ask,” Emma said as she scribbled down their names in her pocketbook. “Whether, I knew or not.” </p><p>“Seems to me like you’re just wanting to keep the face so your captain doesn’t realize your connection to this yet,” Julian leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees. “Cause he or she would kick you off the case if they knew.” </p><p>Emma shrugged. “That’s only if it’s actually connected to my parents case.” She flipped her pocketbook closed and stood up. “If there’s anything else you can think of, don’t hesitate to call the precinct or we’ll get in touch with you if we have any more questions.” </p><p>“You mean you’ll have a different detective reach out, so you don’t have to?” </p><p>
  <em> There he goes calling me out and knowing me too well.  </em>
</p><p>“Jules…” she whispered. </p><p>“You lost the right to call me Jules when you pushed me away,” he stood up and walked towards the door. “I do hope you find my dad’s murderer and hopefully get some closure if it’s the same person.” </p><p>Emma stood there, staring after him as he walked through the bullpen, not knowing what else to do.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Chapter 5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Well I’m sure that could have gone better,” Cristina said as she watched Emma walk back to her desk after her interview with Julian. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma didn’t say anything, just threw her pen and notepad on her desk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright, not even talking. So it was worse than I thought.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “I say we start with the law firm, unless Helen and Mark have anything different to offer us?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The sound of the elevator made Emma turn her head. Immediately she wished she hadn’t; because just like that, Helen and Mark stepped into the squad floor. Emma ducked her head; but she was sure they’d seen her. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Sometimes she really wished life didn’t hate her. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina didn’t miss a beat and pushed back from her desk. “Want me to handle this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded, not trusting herself to speak. She definitely didn’t want to have a repeat of her conversation with Julian. Emma made herself turn around and watched as Cristina led Helen and Mark to an interview room. Emma caught Helen’s eyes and she swore she saw some anger and maybe a little regret in the blue/green orbs. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pushed back from her desk, stood up and grabbed her jacket before walking out of the bullpen. She really needed some to blow off some steam. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>That’s exactly how Cristina found her an hour and a half later. In the precinct gym in the basement, taking everything out on a punching bag. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Knew I’d find you here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Took...you...long...enough,” Emma said between punches and kicks. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina shrugged. “Maybe I was just giving you room to do what you need to do and I knew where you were the entire time.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma scoffed. Of course, Cristina did. Emma knew she shouldn’t be surprised. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma dropped her hands and grabbed the bag to stop it swinging. She panted as she walked to a nearby bench and picked up her water bottle. “Yet I don’t feel any better.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And you most likely won’t. Until you actually deal with this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How did it go with Mark and Helen?” She asked, changing the subject. Emma wasn’t in the mood to talk about it anymore. “I’m sure you actually got information to help the case, instead of having it out with your ex best friend.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Andrew sounds like a great guy and neither one knows anyone who would want to hurt him,” Cristina said, walking further into the room and taking a seat on the bench. “But I did have a thought.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma flopped down on the bench and took another drink of water, slowly working on getting her heart rate and breathing back to normal. “Which is?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe we should look into any cases from both Andrew’s firm and your parent’s,” Cristina began, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “See if there’s any similarities from them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You think it could be someone they put behind bars?” Emma suggested. “Or someone related to someone they put away?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think it’s worth a start, since we really don’t have much else to go on.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It is,” Emma agreed. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Hell maybe there’s a case that they all worked on at some point. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>If they could get that lucky. If it could be as easy as that. If nothing else, hopefully they could find a connection between her parents and Andrew. See if anyone was harboring any hard feelings. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>That was how Cristina and Emma found themselves surrounded by boxes of case files and Chinese takeout spread between their desks. It was late and they should both probably be at home, in their beds, asleep. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>However, Emma couldn’t pull herself away right now. Cristina wasn’t going to let her do it alone. It was why they worked so well. Cristina knew when Emma needed a kick in the ass, but she also knew when Emma just needed support. And she was always there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was a hard thing to find in a partner. And was why Emma had been so set on working alone for most of her time as a cop - until she met Cristina. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Wait, who’s Magnus Bane?” Cristina asked, pulling Emma’s attention. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“His name has come up multiple times through these case files,” Cristina added, sliding a paper across their desks. “From Andrew’s firms and your parents.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pursed her lips. “You know, I don’t know why but that name actually sounds familiar.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pressed a key on her keyboard, bringing her computer to life. After a few moments, searching through the database, she found what she was looking for and gasped. Emma turned the screen to show Cristina. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina’s eyes widened. “Oh yeah, Magnus </span>
  <em>
    <span>Bane</span>
  </em>
  <span> - the fashion designer...But what would be his connection to your parents, or to Andrew?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed “I mean, I know he designed my mom’s wedding dress,” she glanced at Cristina, who had raised an eyebrow. “And I guess he’s been a witness on a few cases here and there. But.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And we have no way of bringing him in either...doesn’t he live in New York?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded. “He’s constantly back and forth between LA and New York, yeah. But I guess we should keep digging because I doubt a fashion designer is our guy.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma stood up from her chair and stretched before walking over to the whiteboard. She grabbed a maker and under known associates wrote </span>
  <em>
    <span>Magnus Bane?? </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“But we’ll keep him in mind...I’ll take anything at this point.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Chapter 6</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“Carstairs, you have a visitor.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma spun around to face the uniform, wondering who could be showing up at her work place to see her. “Wh--” But the question died on her lips as she glanced past the uniform and her eyes fell on Helen Blackthorn. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>What the hell?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you, you may leave,” Emma quickly dismissed the uniform. “What brings you here?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wanted to talk to you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma steeled herself. “Unless it’s something useful pertaining to the case, there’s nothing we have to talk about.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Helen tilted her head. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>Nothing</span>
  </em>
  <span> to talk about? You were just like another sister to me. And then you were just </span>
  <em>
    <span>gone</span>
  </em>
  <span>, Emma. No words, no nothing  just gone within the blink of an eye.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And you came all the way down here to tell me that?” Emma knew she was being a bitch and was over doing it; but she’d been through too much to go down that route again. It was better for everyone if she got rid of Helen as quickly as she could. She didn’t think she could survive getting close to the Blackthorns again. Not if everything blew up in her face again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Maybe I want to know what the fuck is wrong you,” Helen spat out, clearly not taking Emma’s shit. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>Of course not</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Emma bit back a smile, Helen’s fire was Emma’s favorite thing about her. She knew without a doubt that Aline had to have brought it out more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>If they were even still together…</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“People have falling outs all the time, it happens,” Emma knew it was a shitty excuse; but she also couldn’t bring herself to care. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Helen shook her head, not taking it. “There was more to it than that and I think we both know it. This is what you do Emma, you close yourself off and you push people away.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma glanced away, but Helen continued. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You don’t deal with your emotions well, you just shove them down and act like they don’t bother you.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Are you here because you actually care about me or are you here for Julian?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Helen scoffed. “You really think I don’t care about you?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You know, for most of my life I felt like an honorary Blackthorn, like I was one of you,” Emma said. “But when I started pushing Julian and everyone away - none of you fought. You just gave up, just like I did. When I was going through my shit and keeping to myself, no one checked in to see how I was. No one </span>
  <em>
    <span>cared</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Or so it seemed at the time.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma huffed. “Julian did for a while; but I guess he finally got sick of me. Figured he was probably better off without the trainwreck that was me in his life.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“He never stopped caring,” Helen whispered. “He never stopped regretting it.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Funny, he never mentioned that when he was yelling at me the other day.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Do you really blame him, Emma? After the pain you put him through, put us through?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It was better for everyone.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Was it, was it really?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I was too broken!” Emma shouted, she felt her voice breaking and she hadn’t herself for it. Hated that the Blackthorns resurfacing in her life was dredging up all these emotions again. Emotions that she’d worked so damn hard over the past ten years to bury. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She could feel the eyes of the detectives and officers in the bullpen on her; but she didn’t care. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I just - I couldn’t do the whole happy family,” Emma could feel the tears streaming down her face. “It was just a constant reminder of what I’d lost. I needed the time and space to heal and to mourn on my own.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And then you just never came back.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I didn’t come back,” Emma echoed, finally admitting it. “It just got to the point that it was just too late.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It wasn’t....It still isn’t.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma wiped the tears away. “I think we both know that’s a lie. It’s been ten years of pain and hurt. We’re all different people and my last conversation with Julian didn’t go well. He doesn’t want to see me again.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’d be surprised,” Helen said. “With the history here? You never know.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I think the most important thing here is finding your father’s murderer.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Helen gave a sad smile. “And I have faith that you will.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The silence stretched between them; but unlike with Julian, it wasn’t awkward. It wasn't exactly pleasant either but she knew it could definitely be worse. Honestly there was a part of her that wished it could be as easy as Helen was making it seem. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <em>
    <span>But could it?</span>
  </em>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Helen reached out a hesitant hand and placed it on Emma’s shoulder. Emma let her and the older woman gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Just take care of yourself Emma and maybe give reconnecting a thought.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Yeah, okay.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>But she knew it would be a lie. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She knew she didn’t deserve the Blackthorns anymore. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Chapter 7</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Emma yawned as she stepped out of the elevator onto the homicide floor. She hadn’t been sleeping that much since this case started and she was grumpy, exhausted and annoyed. More so than usually. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She and Cristina had run down all the leads they had. They had checked in with the law firm, contacted Ansel Nightshade and every other lawyer who worked for the Blackthorns. They had come up empty handed. No one had any motive for killing them, no one had any other thoughts over who did it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>They were back to square one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You won’t believe what we managed to set up.” Cristina wasted no time when Emma walked in the bullpen, heading towards her desk. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma placed the coffee holder on her desk and dropped a bag of bagels. “I haven’t even had my coffee yet, Cristina.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma opened the bag of bagels while Cristina reached over and took her coffee. “A video chat with Magnus Bane.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma paused with the bagel halfway to her mouth. “How?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina shrugged. “Diana is the one who got it set up. I have no idea how she did it; but she did. Now we at least can talk to him about Andrew and your parents.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When is this?” Emma asked, mouth full of bagel.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina just rolled her eyes. “In a couple hours.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma swallowed her bagel and washed it down with her coffee. “So hopefully he can shed some light on things. Like why he knows Andrew.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Though there is a catch.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma froze with her bagel halfway to her mouth. “What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Diana wants us off this case if this doesn’t go anywhere.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes shot up and she screamed, instantly regretting it when all eyes in the bullpen turned to the two of him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What? Why?” She asked, quieter after the rest of the officers went back to whatever they were doing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’ve ran through every possible lead,” Cristina said, slowly, gauging Emma’s reaction. “If we don’t get a bite with this interview, she’s gonna pull the plug. It’ll officially be a cold case.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s bullshit.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t take it personally, Emma.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t take it personal?” Emma shot back, tilting her head. “When this has to be the same person who killed my parents? When Andrew was a second father to me? When Julian --” but she cut herself off, there was nothing between her and Julian anymore. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina reached across the space between their desks and grabbed Emma's hand, giving it a squeeze. Cristina didn't saying anything, she didn't need to; besides there was nothing<em> to</em> say. </span>
</p>
<hr/><p>
  <span>Two hours later, Emma and Cristina were sitting in an interview room with a laptop set up on the table in front of the couch. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This better be helpful</span>
  </em>
  <span>. Emma was aware of how murder cases went, but usually by now they at least already had a lead. Right now, they had a whole lot of nothing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This better be good,” an unfamiliar voice pulled Emma from her thoughts. Emma turned her full attention to the screen in front of them which showed none other than Magnus Bane. She raised an eyebrow when she saw the </span>
  <em>
    <span>interesting outfit</span>
  </em>
  <span> he was wearing. She almost didn’t want to see the entire thing and was glad they could only see his torso and face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Andrew Blackthorn,” Emma said, getting straight to the point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about.” Emma knew he was hiding something and was deflecting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma leaned forward. “Cut the shit. We know you know him, or at least have worked with him at one point. Your name has come up in some of his case files.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright fine, I hired him as a lawyer before.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s it?” Cristina asked.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yeah, just about.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What about John and Cordelia Carstairs?.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma immediately noticed the breath Magnus sucked in. “And don’t even try to lie,” she told him, “I saw that intake of breath.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Magnus ran a hand through his hair and a part of Emma wondered just how much gel was in it. “Why do you want to know about them?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We think their death is connected to Andrew’s.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Magnus’ eyes widened. “Wait, Andrew’s dead? And you think whoever killed the Carstairs’ killed him?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was slowly losing her patience. “Can you just tell us what you know and stop wasting our time? </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Magnus sighed. “It is much too dangerous.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma clenched her fist. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths. When she reopened her eyes she looked straight at Magnus “If you know who killed my parents, I would like to know.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That seemed to awaken something in the fashion designer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Little Emma Carstairs?” Magnus titled his head. “I should have known...You look just like Cordelia. Just as feisty as her, it seems.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you going to tell us or not?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Magnus sighed. “Your parents never wanted you wrapped up in this...and yet here you are. I can tell you whatever you want to know; but it’s not going to change anything. You’re not going to be able to bring him down.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You clearly underestimate me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When you know the truth, you’ll understand what I mean, Emma.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who is it?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“They call him The Dragon or Lazarus, he goes by a lot of different names,” Magnus said with a sigh. “Though no one really knows who he is.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Do you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I shouldn’t even be telling you this,” Magnus shook his head, as if changing his mind in the process. “No. I won’t tell you. I won’t let you meet the same faith as your parents.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Magnus!” Emma yelled at the screen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Emma. I really am. I value your life, however I value mine more and I do not wish to be The Dragon’s next victim….Please just let this go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m a Carstairs, we don’t give up,” Emma spat out through gritted teeth, before ending the call. She threw herself back into the couch she was sitting on. “Well that was fucking useless.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma shot Cristina a look. “We still don’t have any leads.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We know two of the names this man is using,” Cristina said with a shrug. “I don’t think that’s nothing… A little digging around the underworld and I’m sure we’ll find something.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A moment later the door to the interview room opened and Wrayburn walked in, as if their Captain knew that the interview was over. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything?” Diana Wrayburn was always short and to the point. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The Dragon,” Emma said, staring at her captain, stealing herself. “That was the name Magnus told her.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma saw the flicker of recognition in Wrayburn’s eyes before she pushed it away. If Emma hadn’t been staring, she never would have seen it. Emma easily filed it away for future reference. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Carstairs, Rosales, that’s the end of the case.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What?” Emma spluttered. “You said that if we didn’t get anything, we’d be off. But we </span>
  <em>
    <span>got a lead.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Wrayburn held her ground. “We just don’t have the resources to keep boots on the ground for this case with real leads,” she held up a hand at Emma’s retort. “An alias is not the same thing. Who knows what The Dragon really means, or who this person is. We may never find him….Also, you two have another case, a body of a jogger in Central Park.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma groaned. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can we have an analyst try and see what they can find out about The Dragon?” Cristina asked before Wrayburn left the room. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wrayburn just nodded and closed the door, leaving Emma stewing in her thoughts. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Diana knew my parents....</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Diana knows something about The Dragon....</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>What is she not telling me?</span>
  </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry it's taken so long for this chapter. With everything that's been going on in the world; the pandemic, the protests, the riots, I haven't felt in the mood to focus on writing. Though I have had a lot of chapters for this already written, I changed a big chunk of this chapter, so now I'm going to have to go through and rewrite everything I've written after this. I love that for me. But that's the route these characters want to take now. </p><p>Anyway, I hope you all are staying safe and I hope you enjoy this chapter!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Chapter 8</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Over the next couple of weeks, Emma went through the motions of solving and closing their average run of the mill homicides, starting with that jogger in the park. However, Emma’s mind always drew back towards Andrew’s case. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was on edge and she knew she would be until it was solved. She’d made a promise and she intended to keep it, maybe then, she could fix her relationships with the Blackthorns. Maybe then, they’d start to trust her again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Apparently, the analyst that Wrayburn had look into The Dragon hadn’t found anything. Though a part of Emma couldn’t help but wonder if their captain actually set anyone on it. A nagging force in the back of her mind kept telling her that Diana Wrayburn was hiding something. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>But what?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t know. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cristina,” Emma said, coming back to the present. Cristina just hummed in response, filling out paperwork on her side of the desk. “Do you trust Diana?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina set her pen down and glanced up. “She’s our Captain and she’s good police.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But do you really </span>
  <em>
    <span>trust </span>
  </em>
  <span>her?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina laid her hands across her desk, tilting her head as she looked at Emma. “Where is all this coming from?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I think Diana may be hiding something,” Emma said, her voice barely above a whisper in case of any lingering ears. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina leaned forward and whispered back. “What makes you say that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma took one glance around the bullpen and gestured towards the elevator. She grabbed her jacket and soon, Cristina was following her. Only once they were outside on the sidewalk, the sunrays beating down on them, did she voice her concerns. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can’t stop thinking about it. The way Diana knew my parents, but they never mentioned her,” Emma said, as they fell into step with the rest of the pedestrians, heading south towards Rodeo. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re still on that?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s something else I haven’t told you...After the interview with Magnus, I saw something in Diana’s eyes.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you mean?” Cristina asked, side stepping a teen on a skateboard. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“When I said The Dragon’s name, recognition flashed in her eyes,” Emma clenched her fists. “I think she knows more than she’s letting on.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay, so what do we do about it?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Confusion flashed across Emma’s face for a split second. But she shouldn’t have been surprised, Cristina was the best partner she’d ever had. Cristina would do anything for her, go anywhere with her, put her job, her life on the line for Emma. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Emma admitted. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well we can’t just ask Diana about it. She’ll just shut down, so we’re going to have to get creative.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And sneaky, don’t forget sneaky. We are off this case after all, which is why I’ll understand if you don’t actually want to help me on this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina placed a hand on Emma’s shoulder as they came to stop in front of their favorite deli. “I’m going where you go.” </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>After lunch they headed back to the precinct to finish up their paperwork from their latest case. At least that’s what Emma thought they were going to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Carstairs! Rosales!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The two turned their heads in sync towards the sound of their captain heading towards them. “We got another body for you. It’s gruesome, so I apologize in advance if it affects your lunch.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What are the facts?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“A girl stabbed to death and slumped in an alley off Avalon. Officer Ashdown called it in, CSU is already at the scene. They’re expecting you. I give you a warning, Officer Ashdown sounded shaken.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded as Wrayburn walked away. “Another person stabbed in an alley? What are the odds?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It seems fishy to me,” Cristina responded as they about face and Emma pushed the button on the elevator. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But it can’t be The Dragon,” Emma whispered, as the doors opened and they stepped inside. “Unless whoever this girl is, is somehow related to him. Though what’s the reason Ashdown wimping out.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina pushed the door close button as soon as they stepped inside the lift. “We won’t know until we get there.” </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>Emma stepped out of her squad car and immediately zoned in on the officer that called it in. She regretted the decision soon after. She knew Diana had said he was shaken; but she hadn’t expected </span>
  <em>
    <span>that</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cameron Ashdown was positively green, standing as far away from the alley as he possibly could, holding a barf bag. </span>
  <span>Emma felt for him. It’d been years since they were at the academy together, years since they dated and yet, there was still something lingering there. Though what it was, she wasn’t sure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She’d never actually </span>
  <em>
    <span>loved</span>
  </em>
  <span> him. In fact, if she were being honest with herself, she was using him. He’d been a perfect distraction after her parents died, after she cut ties with the Blackthorns. </span>
  <span>He was hot, he was available and besides, the sex was good. That was always a plus. It was strong for years, then it was off again, on again. Then she made Detective and he didn’t and they lost touch. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma couldn’t help but feel sorry for him though. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She mentally groaned and pushed the thoughts away. She already had enough boy drama for now. She didn’t need to add more to the plate.  </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You okay?” she asked as she came to a stop in front of him, Cristina right on her heels. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh god,” he spat out. “This is fucking embarrassing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma rolled her eyes. “Look Cameron, I don’t give a shit that you look like you’re going to lose your lunch all over the concrete….Just pull yourself together for a second and tell me what’s gotten you so shook up about this one?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Vanessa,” he muttered, under his breath and Emma almost didn’t hear him. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It felt like the wind had been knocked out of her chest and she wanted to take back her rudeness; but it was too late. “Not your cousin?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cameron nodded and gestured towards the alley. “Yeah, my partner and I were just walking between San Padro and Jefferson when this woman flagged us down,” he said through deep breaths and he nodded towards a woman standing nearby. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cristina can you talk to her and I’ll stay here?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wordlessly, Cristina walked towards their witness. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma placed a hand on Cameron’s shoulder and walked him further down the sidewalk. She led him towards a brick wall. “Why don’t you lean against it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pursed her lips as he breathed through the barf bag, slowly coming back to himself, the green tint leaving his face. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He scoffed. “You must think I’m weak.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The other men in the squad would think so. But no, I don’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He narrowed his eyes. “Oh come on, an officer can’t even handle seeing a body. I’d be a laughing stock.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That’s your </span>
  <em>
    <span>cousin</span>
  </em>
  <span> in that alley,” Emma said, firmly, already wanting to knock the heads together of some of the more chauvinistic men in their district. “All of our training doesn’t matter when it’s personal. It’s different when you know the person, it’s different when they’re your family.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry...I should have realized you of all people would understand.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma had almost forgotten that he knew about her parents. Though in her defense it had been pillow talk and she’d pushed it out of her mind. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Are you good here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>He nodded. “My partner is still with the body if you need any more details.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma gave his shoulder a reassuring squeeze before walking away. They may have ended on not good terms, there may be too much baggage there; but she still wished him the best. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Chapter 9</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“What do we have, Officer….” Emma asked, walking down the alley. She stopped in her tracks when her gaze finally landed on Vanessa Ashdown. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pushed down the thoughts as she turned towards Cameron’s partner. The woman’s hand was outstretched towards Emma. She shook it. “Bridgestock ma’am.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do we have, Officer Bridgestock?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Vanessa Ashadown, 28, multiple stab wounds, though I’m sure CSU will have more information for you later,” Bridgestock continued. “Cameron and I were patrolling when we were flagged down by the woman your partner is talking to. I called CSU and your precinct.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Thank you Officer,” Emma said. “If you care, could you and Ashdown start canvassing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Right away, ma’am.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Before you go,” Emma called. “Keep an eye on Cameron, okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don't have to tell me to watch out from Cam,” Bridgestock said, a tone Emma knew all too well creeping into her voice. “I have his back.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I didn’t mean to --”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know. Deep down a part of you still cares and you’re just worried.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma scrunched her face.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cameron told me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma stood there, shocked as Bridgestock walked away, making her way back towards her partner. That was definitely something Emma had not been expecting. She was still standing there when Cristina walked up to her and tapped her on the shoulder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You good?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cameron is sleeping with his partner,” Emma doesn’t know why she said it. Of all the things that could have come out of her mouth, why was it that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“How do you know?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I know,” Emma said, simply, watching as Cameron and Bridgetsock walked down the street, stopping inside a local business. “The understanding there, it runs deeper than your average run of the mill partners. They’re sleeping together and he told her about us.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What does that mean?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma grimaced. “Cameron and I were a thing back in the Academy and for a couple of years afterwards.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina gaped. “And you never told me!”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma sidestepped, avoiding her slap. “It was nothing, not really. Cameron was a distraction when I needed it after… </span>
  <em>
    <span>everything.</span>
  </em>
  <span> We were off and on. He wasn’t the only guy I slept with and there was even a woman or two. Nothing ever amounted to anything serious even if Cameron was the longest.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina nodded and dropped the subject, her detective face falling into place. She quickly recapped to Emma what she learned from their witness, which wasn’t much. The woman was out for a job, when she found Vanessa and immediately ran to flag down some officers. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why didn’t she just call 911?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She panicked, heat of the moment.” Cristina shrugged. “People respond differently to these kinds of things. Besides, I think she saw Ashdown from afar - or at least the uniform.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma glanced back toward the end of the ally, towards where two CSUs were. One kneeling next to the body, swapping. One standing and taking photos. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Vanessa was kind of a bitch, but she didn’t deserve this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She didn’t like you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma chortled, loud and obnoxious. “She fucking </span>
  <em>
    <span>hated</span>
  </em>
  <span> me. It was honestly kind of hilarious. As if I wasn’t good enough for her cousin.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t think this is The Dragon, do you?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma sighed. “I’m going to wait until we get the autopsy and CSU reports back, but, the stab wounds, the slump of the body in an alley. It sure seems like it. Or at the very least, it’s someone who is connected to the Dragon.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like known associates?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If he’s as bad as Magnus and Diana are making him say. Yeah, he definitely has a lot of them.” </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>“Do you think looking back through your parents' cases would help?” Cristina asked later as Emma was driving back to the precinct. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“For? I’ve gone over those files with a fine tooth comb, ‘Tina” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“If you think there’s a connection between your parents, Andrew and Diana. There could have been something you missed before?” Cristina suggested. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma thought for a moment, realizing it was a bad idea as soon as she thought it. “Or I could - </span>
  <em>
    <span>we</span>
  </em>
  <span> could take a look at Andrew’s cases.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“That would mean talking to Julian.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma grimaced, gripping the steering wheel harder than she needed to. “Yeah I know. And that could totally not go our way, since he does hate me and all.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina sighed. “He doesn’t hate you. He’s just hurt.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma scrunched her eyes. “How could you possibly know that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I never told you everything about the interview I conducted with Mark and Helen,” Cristina said, slowly, hesitantly. “Mark kind of gave more information than needed.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is that what prompted Helen to come see me afterwards?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Maybe?” Cristina glanced towards her window, glancing out at the passing pine trees. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Silence passed between them as Emma continued driving towards the precinct, soft music playing over the speakers. The windows were cracked and the wind was blowing inside. It was nice, she could almost ignore the fact that they were on a case. She could almost believe they were just two women on a daytime drive. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Though Emma knew the facade couldn’t last. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was still a Detective with two dead parents, a dead second father, a second family that possibly hated her, and a current case to close. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She had to get back to business, despite how much she wished she didn’t have to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Does this mean that you’re up for some afterhours sleuthing when we’re off shift?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m going where you go.” Cristina echoed her words from earlier. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma knew that she couldn’t handle this case alone, not again. She couldn’t fall back into that rabbit hole again - this time she knew she wouldn’t be able to crawl her way out. She was grateful Cristina would be there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She just hoped that it didn’t end badly for either of them. Emma couldn’t bare it if Cristina lost her job because of her. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>did I subtly make emma bi? yes, yes i did</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Chapter 10</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Emma and Cristina stood outside the oak door, hoping </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone</span>
  </em>
  <span> was home. Emma was knocking pretty loudly. She knew it was a slim chance that a Blackthorn would actually be at their childhood home; but it was a chance she was going to take. Mostly because she had no idea where any of them moved to and she wasn’t desperate enough to use her police resources to find out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was pleasantly surprised when Julian opened the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you want Emma?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She took him in, he looked rough. </span>
  <em>
    <span>Really </span>
  </em>
  <span>rough. He had dark circles under his eyes and Emma knew he hadn’t been sleeping lately. He probably hasn’t been eating much either. Emma knew she didn’t when her parents were first murdered. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Iknowwhomurderedyourfather!” she blurted out, stumbling over her words in her rush.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian took a slight step back. “What?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>It was Cristina who answered this time. “We kind of know who murdered your father.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian ran a hand through his hair. “Already? How?....Wait, what do you mean kind of?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We don’t have an actual name,” Emma started, slowly. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian raised a brow and leaned against the door frame. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We just have an Alias from Magnus Bane,” Cristina supplied. “Whoever killed Andrew and Emma’s parents goes by the name “The Dragon’ or “Lazurus’. But that’s all we know because Magnus refused to give us any more information.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian sighed and ran a hand through his hair “That still doesn’t explain why you’re here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We want to look through your father’s case files,” Emma responded. “See if I can find anything helpful in them.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian looked skeptical. “You think there’s something to be anything in there?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m desperate here, Julian.”Emma sighed, shrugging. “Look, I know this is weird and awkward and it’s my fault, but --”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s my fault too,” Julian interrupted her. “I could have fought harder, made more of an effort to keep in touch, to check in on you.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>They stood there in an awkward silence, the weight of the last ten years settling over them. Emma knew there was years of hurt, distrust and baggage between them, that was going to take much more than a cast to fix. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She was almost regretting dragging Cristina into her mess, her partner didn’t deserve this. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You can look through his files,” Julian started, moving a little away from the doorway. “But I’m helping.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma’s eyes widen. To say that she was shocked that Julian was willingly volunteering to put himself in the same room as well would be an understatement. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Just because you write about them, doesn’t mean you’re a cop. Or that you’re not personally involved in this case.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian cocked a head and smirked. “You mean like yourself?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma rolled her eyes. “Touche. But seriously if my captain found out, she’d probably kill me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We are technically off the case,” Cristina added. “So anything that happens stays in this house.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian nodded, moving out of the way and letting them inside. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>That was how Emma found herself sitting in Andrew’s old office with Cristina and Julian, digging through case files. Never in her life did she think she’d be in this house again. It was surreal. Though she knew things weren’t magically fixed; but perhaps, it was a small start. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>“What exactly are we looking for?” Julian said, dropping a box on the floor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Any case that involves my parents, your dad and our police captain.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian raised an eyebrow. “You think your own Captain is involved?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma shrugged. “I don’t know. I just know she’s hiding something and I have a bad feeling.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ve never had a partner like Emma before,” Cristina added as Julian glanced at her. “I trust her with my life and I trust her on this.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian pondered for a moment before he spoke again. “Was nothing in your parent’s cases?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I can look through them again later, but I’ve gone through them so many times. There was nothing there.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well you also didn’t think Diana was involved until now,” Cristina said, tossing aside a folder to the growing stack of useless files. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So you think they got rid of everything that could incriminate your captain?” Julian added his own folder to the stack. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma shrugged. “Or they hid the truth where I couldn’t find it. Probably to keep me away from it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And here you are, dragging yourself into it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma threw aside another useless file and huffed. “This is me, doing my </span>
  <em>
    <span>job. </span>
  </em>
  <span>I am a homicide detective trying to bring down a murderer.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It seemed too easy, the two of them falling back to a similar routine like when they were teenagers. Emma doing homework or stretching and doing yoga before practice, while Julian wrote or painted. Except now, they were well grown adults looking through attorney's case files. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma would be lying if she said she didn’t miss this. She’d also be lying if she said she didn’t regret pushing him away. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You really don’t have to help us.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian scoffed. “You really don’t think I’m doing this for </span>
  <em>
    <span>you</span>
  </em>
  <span>, right? This son of a bitch killed my father, I want to see him burn just as much as you.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Well that hurt</span>
  </em>
  <span>...</span>
  <em>
    <span>But it’s your own fault, Carstairs. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina pushed herself off from her spot on the floor. “You know what, I’m gonna let you two chat. I think you need it.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Help yourself to anything in the kitchen,” Julian called after Cristina’s retreating figure. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma mentally groaned, she both hated and appreciated the fact that Cristina left them alone. She ripped off the metaphorical bandaid, there was no need beating around the bush here.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Look, I know I hurt you when I pushed you away, pushed all of you away...But, is there </span>
  <em>
    <span>any</span>
  </em>
  <span> way that we can move past that? Get back to what we used to be?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think it’s possible to get back to how we were…But we can try and see where we are today.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma glanced up at him. “You mean that?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You were my best friend at one point Emma. And yeah, it hurt like hell when you shut me out, but I never stopped caring even if I was royally pissed off. It’s just been easier to hate you then feel anything else.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Does everyone hate me?” Emma asked, though she was afraid of the answer. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Dru and Livvy definitely do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma gave a soft chuckle. “Yeah that definitely sounds right.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Helen and Mark, I think understand why you left, Ty doesn’t really understand. I think Tavvy probably holds some resentment too but he’s never really said anything.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma nodded. “I deserve all of that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>After a moment, Julian sighed. “It’s just to take some time Emma. They’ll all come around again.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma gave a sad smile, if only she actually believed that. </span>
</p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Chapter 11</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“I’m Detective Carstairs, this is Detective Rosales,” Emma announced, holding her up badge. “We’d like to talk to Patrick Penhallow.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The woman at the desk looked up and a frown immediately appeared on her face. Emma swore as soon as she realized who it was; Paige Ashdown. Emma cursed. She really wasn’t able to catch a break where the damn Ashdowns were concerned, was she?</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Is Mr. Penhallow in?” Emma asked again, clipping her badge back to her pants. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He’s in a meeting right now, you’re going to have to wait,” Paige retorted, her tone clipped. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“This is important police business, he’s going to have to hurry up,” Emma crossed her arms. “Though I guess I can always come back with a warrant to search the premises if he doesn’t want to have a chat with us.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Paige finally relented, probably only because she’d rather get Emma in and out as quickly as she could. Emma almost smiled, years later and Paige still hated her guts. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A few moments later, a door at the back of the office opened up and a tall, dark haired man built like a tree walked out with the most striking blue eyes Emma had ever seen. He was followed by another man. The two men shook hands before the dark haired man walked away, stalking past Emma on his way towards the door. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What is the meaning of this?” the other man said and Emma quickly realized that he was in fact Patrick Penhallow. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We’d need to ask you a few questions about a murder, Mr. Penhallow,” Emma got right to the point, she wasn’t in the mood to beat around the bush. Not with everything at stake. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick looked from Emma to Cristina, before his eyes landed on Julian. “What are you doing here, Jules?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma saw Julian roll his eyes. She knew he hated when people called him Jules. He only let his family call him that. Once upon a time that honor had also resided with her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma took a breath, stealing herself and trying to appear taller, making her presence more known. “He’s assisting on the case...We need to talk to you about Andrew Blackthorn and Vanessa Ashdown.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma and Julian had come across Patrick’s name while they were digging through Andrew’s case files. Patrick had been a detective on a big drug bust a few years in the past, even having a hand at bringing down a major cartel. In the years since though, he had retired from the force and had started a community center to help kids in the neighborhood. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>He helped keep them off the street, to make sure more kids didn’t get swept up in the drug trade. To show them that they had better options. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma had decided that they should talk to him as soon as she realized it was a drug case, since they’d found drugs on Vanessa’s person, and she worked for Penhallow’s nonprofit. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick sighed. “Let’s step into my office.” </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>“Yes, Vanessa worked for me off and on. She handled all the day to day, the books, losing her was a loss. I’m thankful Paige stepped in to help out. The poor girl is distraught.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And Andrew?” Emma pressed. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes, I knew Andrew. He was the prosecutor on that drug bust I was working on back in the day,” Patrick said, settling into his chair. “But I don’t see what relevance this has.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We’re leaving no stone untouched, sir,” Cristina said. “Were you aware that Vanessa was pushing drugs?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick blanched. “Vanessa? No! Of course not. She wouldn’t.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We found drugs in her pockets at the crime scene. Though there wasn’t any in her system according to autopsy reports; so it’s safe to assume she was just pushing them. Not taking them,” Cristina said, briskly. “Any idea why?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She’d have her moments, same as anyone; but she was a good person. But I never would have pegged her for being involved with drugs.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t think it had anything to do with that drug bust you were a part of, do you?” Cristina said, her voice etching a little into condonsesing. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone involved was arrested.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You worked that case with Diana Wrayburn, didn’t you?” Emma asked, giving him a pointed look.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She was just a rookie and we just used her as an undercover a lot during that case. She made Detective because of that bust. What does that have to do with anything?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You wouldn’t happen to know The Dragon, would you?” Emma asked, clicking her tongue and tilting her head. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick immediately tensed up. “No, I’m afraid not.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma knew she was on to something. Truthfully she’d been fishing when she mentioned Diana and The Dragon, she didn’t actually think they were all connected with that drug case...but if Penhallow’s response was any indication. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You’re going to have to be a better liar, Mr. Penhallow.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick sighed. “Look, you’re going down a pretty rough road, Detective. You don't know what you’re up against.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma just smirked. “You’re not the first person to tell me that, and you’re probably not the last one either. I know what I’m getting myself into.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You don’t. You can’t know. You weren’t involved with him back in the day. He’s ruthless. He will stop at nothing to get to the top, no matter what; and he’ll stop at nothing to keep everyone quiet.” Patrick leaned back in his chair, his hands fidgeting. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Who is the Dragon?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Look I made some bad decisions back during my rookie days, even some during my detective days,” Patrick said, placing his hands in a triangle on his desk. “I got in bed with the wrong people, looked the other way and let them be. I was in deep with The Dragon. This whole mess is partly my fault --”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Then help me stop it!” Emma shouted, cutting him off. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Patrick shook his head. “I wish I could. But I’m doing good in this community, I’m making a difference in these kid’s lives. If I tell you what I know, </span>
  <em>
    <span>He</span>
  </em>
  <span> will have me killed and then these kids will have no one.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers. “Is there anything you </span>
  <em>
    <span>can</span>
  </em>
  <span> tell me.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Diana and I covered up for one of The Dragon’s associates during that drug bust,” Patrick said, eventually. He looked down at his desk, refusing to meet Emma’s gaze. “And in return we got protection from him, and in the force, I made Lieutenant and Diana made Detective.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So The Dragon is - or was operating a drug operation?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He was a part of one. I don’t know if he still is. I haven’t spoken to him in years. I’ve stayed out of his way, especially now that I’ve left the force and I’d like to keep it that way. And no, I still won’t tell you who he is.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“But there has to be something out there that we can use to figure out who he is, and to stop him.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Anything that could have brought him to justice has been destroyed, and any person has been paid off or killed.” Patrick sighed. “Unless you managed to find any shred of evidence in Andrew’s papers.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian raised an eyebrow. “You think my father still had something?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Unless he had it on his person when he was murdered, which I highly doubt,” Patrick glanced between the three of them. “Though I’m sure if he did have anything, you wouldn’t be here talking to me…”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“So what you’re saying is you have nothing.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry, Detectives, but I’m afraid not. And I’m also afraid that I’m going to have to ask you not to bother me anymore.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>With a sigh, Emma shoved back from her chair and stalked to the door, Cristina and Julian on her heels.</span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Chapter 12</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So um, I'm not even sure if anyone is still reading this or not; but I got the inspiration to try and finish this, so here's another chapter</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“If it wasn’t for Aline, I would have pushed him more,” Emma said as soon as the three of them were back in her squad car. “I need </span>
  <em>
    <span>someone</span>
  </em>
  <span> to tell me who The Dragon is.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Cristina reached across the console and placed a hand on Emma’s arm. “We’re not giving up. We just need to find another way to go about this.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, Aline and Patrick’s relationship is strained and has been for a couple of years now,” Julian said, leaning against her car. “But, yeah it’d be a good idea to not get the man killed.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma furrowed her brows and glanced at Julian. “Since when?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Another thing you’d know if you kept in touch.” </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Ouch</span>
  </em>
  <span>... </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I deserved that.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian let out a breath. “Em.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma tensed, the old nickname doing more to her than she realized. But she pushed the thoughts away, they weren’t fixed, they weren’t back to who they were before. It was nothing more than an honest slip up because of how much time they were spending together. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Don’t let yourself hope Emma. </span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma just shook her head. “No, you’re right. It’s on me. If I had bothered to actually pick up a phone from time to time, I would know things. And it’s on me to fix it.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Us actually,” Julian amended. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And I don’t want to be that person who breaks up a moment,” Cristina said, slowly and hesitantly. “But we still have a job to do.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Well it seems like the next plan of attack is talking to your Captain,” Julian said, glancing between the two detectives.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll do it,” Emma started, holding up a hand stopping Cristina or Julian from arguing with her. She turned towards Cristina. “Diana already took us off this case, I don’t want you going down with me. She expects this shit from me; but not from you.” She turned towards Julian. “And you’re a civilian who shouldn’t be this deeply involved.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian shrugged, casually and winked. “I’ve always been a rebel.”</span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>When they returned to the precinct, Cristina and Julian went off to an empty interview room. The plan was to make it look like Julian had remembered something about the case. Whereas Emma strolled directly to Diana’s office. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She pushed through the door without even knocking and slammed it in her wake. Diana jumped, knocking files and papers to the floor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Carstairs, what is the meaning of this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma crossed her arms, sending a glare towards her captain. “You’ve been yanking mine and Cristina’s chains ever since Andrew’s body showed up in that alley.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Diana just stared at him. “The case went cold.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because you wouldn’t let me dig too far,” Emma retorted, her voice cold and harsh. “Because you didn’t want me to find out that you worked a drug case with Patrick Penhallow when he was still on the force."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The words were coming faster than Emma could keep up. She was angry, she was hurt, she felt betrayed at the one person she’d trusted. “Because you didn’t want me to find out that the two of you let a very bad person get off. Because you didn’t want me to find out about the Dragon. Because you didn’t want me to know that you were in bed with him!” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was yelling now, but she couldn’t bring herself to care. She couldn’t even bring herself to care about the tears escaping the edges of her eyes, running down her cheeks. “But my parents knew, they were close to bringing him down and he paid someone to have them killed. Just like he paid someone to have Andrew killed."</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“All this time, I trusted you and all this time, you’ve been part of the reason that my parents are dead. All this time, you’ve been lying to me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why couldn’t you have just let this </span>
  <em>
    <span>go,”</span>
  </em>
  <span> Diana was begging, pleading.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m a Carstairs. It’s what we do. We don’t back down from a fight.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And that’s why your parents got killed,” Diana told her, shaking her head. “They wouldn’t want this for her.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t you dare tell me what my parents would want!” Emma spat out. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Diana ran a hand over her face. “The reason why I wanted you away from this case wasn’t to try and hide my involvement. It really wasn’t Emma,” she added at Emma’s unbelieved look. “It was because I didn’t want you to end up like <em>them</em>, like Andrew.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Everyone has told me that,” Emma huffed, throwing her hands up in the air. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Magnus started this, didn’t he?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“He gave me the alias, ‘The Dragon’,” Emma admitted, glancing down at her feet. “I put two and two together to realize that you were hiding something. Then some digging through some of Andrew’s old files led us to Patrick, which led to that drug bust. Which led me here.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You dragged Rosales into this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma shook her head and figured she didn’t need to lie anymore. “I didn’t need to, she’s my partner. She’ll back me every step.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Diana let out a sigh and ran her hand over her face. “You can try, Emma; but there is no proof - he is untouchable.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Why does everyone </span>
  <em>
    <span>keep saying that?</span>
  </em>
  <span> How can one man be so untouchable?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Because that man is --” Diana stopped, almost as if she was changing her mind. Emma could see the inner war raging in her. “That man is Malcolm Fade.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>The words took a minute to process and Emma found herself walking backwards on wobbly feet to crash onto Diana’s couch. “You don’t mean </span>
  <em>
    <span>Senator</span>
  </em>
  <span> Fade?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“The one and only.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Kay, so maybe he is fucking untouchable,” Emma grumbled. She took a moment to compose herself; before cutting her gaze back to Diana. “But there </span>
  <em>
    <span>has to be something.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cordelia always said she had what it would take to bring him down, but I don’t know where she kept it, or even if it still exists.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma forced herself to meet Diana’s gaze. “Wait, if everyone who has ever talked, or gotten close has been killed. Why are you telling me this?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I should have known you weren’t going to stop Emma. But maybe this way, you’ll at least have </span>
  <em>
    <span>some</span>
  </em>
  <span> clue as to how to operate under the radar.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>A moment of tense silence passed between the two. Emma was clenching and unclenching her hands, trying to calm her conflicting emotions. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Cristina and I also think Vanessa Ashdown was killed by whoever was hired to kill my parents and Andrew; because the crime scenes have been the same,” Emma finally admitted. “She also had drugs on her, so it could potentially mean she was working for whoever you and Patrick let go.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“HIs name is Horace Dearborn,” Diana said softly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “He’s now </span>
  <em>
    <span>the </span>
  </em>
  <span>Drug Kingpin of NorCal.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma processed everything Diana had told her, adding it to the mix of everything she already knew. “So, Fade got into bed with Dearborn back in the day. You and Patrick let Dearborn go during that drug bust. And now Fade is the Senator? How does Magnus fit into all of this?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Magnus was never actually a </span>
  <em>
    <span>part</span>
  </em>
  <span> of it. He was just Malcolm’s friend. But I guess he’s guilty by association?” Diana rattled off. She leaned forward and gripped the edges of her desk. “I guess he found out about it and Malcolm threatened him to silence. They haven’t spoken in years - they had a falling out during his campaign.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma scoffed. “You’re saying that Fade’s entire campaign was built on drug laundering? He fixed his way into office?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Like I said, he’s a powerful man.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Until I stop him.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <em>
    <span>If </span>
  </em>
  <span>you can Emma. there’s no guarantee that he won’t come after you too. And if he is somehow connected to your new vic through Dearborn, let it go.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma jumped up from her perch on the couch. “I will </span>
  <b>
    <em>not</em>
  </b>
  <span> let the death of a family member of a fellow brother in blue go. I’ll find a way to make Dearborn rot.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stormed out of Diana’s office without another word. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Chapter 13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next morning, Emma and Cristina were sitting across the table from Horace Dearborn. He was every bit as arrogant, cocky and full as himself as any drug kingpin who’d been in business for more than a decade would be. </p><p>Emma hated him on sight. </p><p>“I’m not one to enjoy having my time wasted,” Horace said, interlocking his hands together on the steel table. “I’m a very busy man.”</p><p>“Oh I’m sure,” Emma shot back. “A heavy drug operation up and down the west coast, but focusing mostly up North isn’t going to run itself.” </p><p>His eyes narrowed; but only slightly. “I don’t know what you mean. I’m just a businessman.” </p><p>“Correction, you’re a drug pusher. You sucked Vanessa Ashdown into your world. Only she pissed you off, betrayed you or got too close to a business partner, so you axed her.” </p><p>“I’ve never met this girl you speak of --”</p><p>“Haven’t you?” Cristina said, picking a picture of Vanessa’s body out of her folder and sliding it across the table. “We have witnesses that tie her back to you and your drug operation. We also have the drugs that she had on her.” </p><p>Dearborn clenched his hands, another slight motion. </p><p>Emma hummed. “Loss of product is bad for business isn’t it?”</p><p>The man didn’t respond, just simply dropped his hands and leaned back in the chair. He was enjoying this, yanking them around, holding up this pretense. He draped one arm behind the chair, shifting slightly to the side. </p><p>“You really are just like your mother,” Dearborn said, slowly, threatening. “That bitch also couldn’t keep her nose out of something she had no business in. Except she ended up in the trash - maybe you’d like to join her.” </p><p>Emma was seething with anger, it flowed through every bone in her body. Before she even realized what was happening, she slipped away from the table, her chair flying out behind her. She flew across the table, grabbed Dearborn by his suit front and shoved him into the wall behind them, cracking the mirror between the interrogation room and the observation room. </p><p>“Don’t you <em> ever </em>mention my mother.” </p><p>Dearborn just laughed, his entire body shaking; either from the motion or Emma’s grip on him, she didn’t know. “This kitty has claws. Oh, this is gonna be fun.”</p><p>The next five minutes, or maybe ten, or even an hour, Emma wasn’t completely sure, went by in a blur. She heard Cristina yelling her name. She vaguely heard the door opening and Diana yelling her name. She definitely was out of it as two Officers dragged her out of the interrogation room and as far away from Horace Dearborn as they could get. </p><p>Somehow, she ended up in the robbery division of the precinct, three floors below homicide. At first, she didn’t think anyone would find her, until she felt someone sit next to her on the bench. She didn’t have to look to know it was Cristina. </p><p>Cristina laid a comforting hand on Emma’s knee, squeezing it gently. </p><p>“I’m a dead woman, aren’t I?” Emma doesn’t know why she spoke the words, doesn’t know when she realized it; but she knew it was true. “Because of this, word is gonna get back to Fade and you’ll be at my crime scene.” </p><p>“Emma, don’t.”</p><p>Emma turned her head, tears glistening in her eyes. “That’s what everyone’s been telling me this entire time hasn’t it? That if I dig too much, if I push too far, I’ll end up just like my parents? Well guess what?”</p><p>“We don’t know what’s going to happen.”</p><p>Emma pulled herself together, held her head high and let the mask fall into place. “I guess I just have to hit harder.” </p><p>“Emma…”</p><p>Emma pushed up from the bench and turned her head towards Cristina. “I know it’s pointless to tell you to not follow me, so I won’t.” She held out her hand, Cristina grabbed it and was pulled to her feet. </p><p>“Diana let Dearborn go after your little act,” Cristina recapped to her as they walked back towards the elevator, towards the homicide floor. </p><p>“Of course she did…I just want to be able to charge someone for this. Give Cameron that closure.”</p><p>“You have a good heart, Emma,” Cristina said, pushing the button and calling the elevator. “Sometimes it just gets you into trouble.”</p><p>Emma groaned. “Please don’t remind me.”</p><hr/><p>By mid morning the next day, Emma found herself in her morgue with Cristina. They’d been a body dropped last night; however no one called Emma or Cristina to the scene. Diana had taken the lead at the crime scene.</p><p>“We ID’d the body as Dane Larkspear. He died from asphyxiation sometime between midnight and 2am and was dumped in an alley where he was found,” their medical examiner, Lovelace or something or other related to them. </p><p>“Any connection to our active case?” Emma questioned the M.E. </p><p>The man pulled an evidence bag from the steel table next to the autopsy table. He wordlessly handed it to Emma. </p><p>“That was found on his person.” </p><p>Emma took it and read the note inside. </p><p>
  <em> You wanted the man who killed your parents so much. Considering this a parting gift from The Dragon.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>- HD</em>
</p><p>Emma glanced up, looked between the body on the table and Cristina. “It’s Dearborn. He’s fucking with me because of that show in the interrogation room. He thought this would be a treat for me, didn’t he?” she added before handing the note to Cristina. </p><p>Without another word, Emma left the room. She stepped into the hall and pulled out her cell phone - she only hoped he would answer. </p><p>“Emma?”</p><p>The breath left her as soon as Julian spoke, making her forget almost why she’d called in the first place. “You kept my number, all these years?”</p><p>A moment of silence, she could only hear his breathing through the phone. “You know, me, I don’t delete anything,” he said eventually, but Emma knew it was a lie. He wasn’t one to hold on to much unless it meant <em> something </em>. “Why’d you call?”</p><p>“We found the man who actually killed your father, technically.” </p><p>“How?”</p><p>Emma quickly relayed every information that she could with him, ending with the body on the slab in the morgue. She let out a breath when she was done. </p><p>“You did what? To a drug kingpin?”</p><p>“He was shitting on my mother, I snapped, okay!” Emma defended herself, leaning against the cool wall of the hallway. “I don’t really know what came over me, alright.” </p><p>“I guess I can live in peace with the fact that my father’s murderer is dead,” Julian said, after a moment. Emma could almost see him through the phone, running a hand through his hair. “But I’d really feel better if Malcolm Fade was taken down.” </p><p>“You and me both. But I don’t know <em> how </em> I can without ending up just like them.” </p><p>“You’re Emma Cordelia Carstairs, you’ll figure it out. I have faith in you.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Chapter 14</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Over the next few days, Emma had noticed Diana keeping more to herself, staying in her office with the door closed instead of propped open like it normally was. She’d also noticed how worn down and withdrawn Diana was. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Despite everything that had transpired between the two, Emma was worried about her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma had reluctantly caved and stopped digging into Fade, mostly because they’d hit a brick wall. She was tired of going in circles. She was tired of always ending back up on square one. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Beside, their normal homicide cases and paperwork didn’t stop and she had an actual job to do. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“What do you think is going on with Diana?” Emma questioned one day, when she was over staying quiet on the matter. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I don’t know,” Cristina responded, glancing towards her office. “Could it be the case? Gulit? A little bit of both? Who knows?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma knew there was something more to it, there had to have been. Diana had always been the tough, no nonsense Captain; but she’d always cared, in her own way. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma had realized that now. Everything Diana had done, she’d done to try and keep Emma safe. Though, Emma didn’t agree with it, would probably never forgive her for her hand in her parent’s murder; but she could understand part of it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She could understand Diana wanting to pull her from the case from the start. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“There’s something going down,” Emma whispered, glancing back towards hers and Cristina’s combined desks. She didn’t know what made her say it or how she knew. But there was something new in the air, a spark, a feeling. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma knew that everything she knew was about to change. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>And for the first time since joining the force, she was terrified. </span>
</p><hr/><p>
  <span>That feeling is exactly why she found herself following Diana that night. Emma didn’t realize why Diana was going to an abandoned airplane hangar of all places; but it reinforced that something bad was going to happen. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma let out a breath. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Diana what the fuck are you doing?</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma stepped out of the darkness, coming to a stop a few feet from Diana. She squared her shoulders and said her captain’s name. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma,” Diana hissed, spinning around to face her. “What are you doing here?”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Following you,” Emma said with a shrug. “I’ve realized something was up with how you’ve been acting and I knew I had to follow you to figure out whatever you’ve gotten yourself into.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I’m doing this to protect you, Emma,” Diana ran a hand over her face. “I’m taking a stand. It’s something I should have done a long time ago; but I was too much of a coward.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma narrowed her eyes. “What are you talking about?” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Larkspear, Dearborn, Fade, Patrick, me, this thing runs so much deeper than that,” Diana explained quickly. “They’re coming to finish the job and I need you to leave.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“You expect me to just leave and let you die!” Emma shouted, staggering backwards. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“I do and you must, I’m sorry. I don’t expect you to forgive me for my hand in this; but I hope you will forgive me for trying to save your life. Take her out of here.” Diana called into the dark, just as headlights hovered through the darkened hanger. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was confused for only a moment until arms wrapped around her and pulled her away. She fought like hell; but it was no use, whoever had her was too strong. Of course, it didn’t make her stop, she just fought harder. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma…Em, stop, it’s me,” Julian breathed into her ear as they went through a doorway, away from the hanger, from Diana, from the SVU with men who were going to kill her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Julian, let me go. I can’t let Diana do this. Not for me.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“She wants to, Emma,” Julian said, firmly. “Diana is the one who called me; because she was sure you’d follow her. She doesn’t want you here to see this, she doesn’t want you caught in the crossfire.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Julian, let me go!” Emma pleaded, her voice cracking. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Julian’s grip on her just tightened as an engine cut off, doors opened and slammed in the hangar. She gave up her fighting, finally admitting that it was no use - there was no way Julian was going to let her risk her life, even with the history there. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Especially </span>
  </em>
  <span>with the history there. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was forced to just stand there and do nothing. She slumped against Julian as she heard gunshots fire out, echoing over the cavernous space of the hangar. </span>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Diana…</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <span>She didn’t know how much time had passed before Julian, finally let her go. But when he did, she didn’t feel like moving. She couldn’t move. She was frozen in place, not daring to move, not having the strength to. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma?” Julian slowly approached the situation. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma finally stepped away from him and took off in a run, towards the hangar. Though as soon as she broke through the doorway and came to the place where her Captain had been standing, she wished she hadn’t. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stumbled backwards into something solid. She realized that Julian had followed her. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We have to call it in, we need CSU down here,” Emma rattled off what needed to be done, disconnected from everything. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Emma,” Julian said again. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“We can’t just leave her here, Jules. We need to clear the scene, call in the troops to do their job. </span>
  <em>
    <span>We can’t leave her.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“And we won’t,” Julian responded, reaching for her arm. This time, she let him pull her away. “Hand me your phone and I’ll call Cristina.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Wordlessly, Emma reached into her pocket, pulled out her phone, unlocked it and handed it to Julian. Once he had the device, she pushed passed him and made her way outside into the cool, night air. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She found a spot and sat, crossed legged on the ground, leaning up against the wall of the hangar. She didn’t know how long it took everything to play out. Emma sat there, watching as the crime scene unit showed up and made their way inside, to rope off and process the scene. She stayed there, even as Cristina showed up with other Detectives from their floor. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She stayed there, even as she was joined by Julian and Cristina, each taking a seat on either side of her. She was only vaguely aware of Julian slipping her phone back into her hand. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“No one outside of the three of us learns the whole truth about what happened here,” Emma spoke, her voice hoarse. “No one outside of us knows about Diana’s involvement.” </span>
</p><p>
  <span>Emma was going to be damned if all the good Diana had done for the force, for the city, was going to be overshadowed, or questioned because of this. She’d be damned if the entire homicide division was questioned. She could already see IAB coming in and reopening every case they’d ever touch, leaving no stone untouched. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>It wasn’t worth it. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Okay.”</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Alright.” </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Chapter 15</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>A knock at her door, pulled Emma away from the files she was flipping through. She dropped the folder on the coffee table as she stood up, making her way towards her front door. It wasn’t like she could concentrate that much after everything that had happened last night with Diana.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>She still couldn’t believe her Captain was dead. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma shook the thoughts off and peaked through the peephole and was surprised. Emma opened her door to find Julian staring back at her, takeout in his hand. She just raised a brow. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I brought Thai,” Julian said, sheepishly. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma just wordlessly stepped away, inviting him inside.</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I know this is random and all --”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“What are you doing here, Jules?” Emma asked, cutting him off. She closed the door and finally turned around. “Sorry, that was rude.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian chuckled. “I’ll give that a pass under the circumstances…I wanted to check on you. We’ve been kind of civil during this and it almost feels like we’re back to how we used to be.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma nodded as she made her way back towards the couch. “Almost; but not quite. I can’t be the only one here that still senses some awkwardness.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Though for Emma, that awkwardness was in part because of whatever lingering feelings that went beyond more than friendship she felt. It was on her - she knew Julian didn’t feel the same way. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He couldn’t, </span>
  <em>
    <span>could he?</span>
  </em>
  
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I’m hoping that since you invited me in, then you’re willing to work past that.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Maybe a part of me is just scared of fucking things up again; but with what Helen said, maybe it’s not too crazy to want to try and fix things?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian’s head popped up. “You’ve talked to Helen?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She came to the precinct at the beginning of the case,” Emma explained, flopping down on the couch. “After we brought her and Mark in.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian joined her on the couch, not being able to keep a smirk off his face. “Of course she did.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“She meant well,” Emma told him. “And I definitely needed to hear some of it.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma leaned forward, opened one of the containers and her mouth dropped. She turned her head towards Julian. “It’s been ten years and you still remembered my favorite?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian glanced down and ran a hand around the back of his neck. “I just hoped that your favorites hadn’t changed in the past decade.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma shook her head. “Not for this.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>The two of them settled into her couch after dividing up the food between them. Emma soon realized that he bought too much food for just two people; but pushed the thought away, putting a random movie up on Netflix to play in the background while they ate. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You’re back to digging through your parents' old cases?” Julian asked, nodding his head towards the coffee table. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Guilty,” Emma replied after she swallowed her bite of food. “I pulled them out again as if I haven’t already poured through every last one of them, multiple times.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“But you were going back through them to see if Malcolm popped up?”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma nodded. “But there’s nothing there. So either they hid it well, or Patrick was right and Malcolm cleaned house.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That doesn’t mean that </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> isn’t somewhere,” Julian stated, taking a sip from the wine that Emma poured. “Your parents, especially your mom, were too smart to not have a backup plan in case things went south.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“That’s what Diana said, that my mom had something; but maybe she hid it a little too </span>
  <em>
    <span>good</span>
  </em>
  <span>, considering that I can’t find anything.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Well, she couldn’t have made it easy It would have been easy for Fade to find whatever it is.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“You seem so convinced that something is out there.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Something is.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian was so adamant, kind of how Emma was ten years ago when she was first going through her parent’s murder. Over the years, the optimism left her, she stopped believing that something was going to come from it. She stopped believing she’d ever find their killer. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Now she knew who the killer was. It was only a matter of trying to find the evidence to stick his ass to the wall. She was thankful for Julian being so positive over the whole situation, it was starting to rub off on her again. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“Thank you. For being there when Diana called, for being here now.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Julian reached over and grasped her hand. “You’re my best friend, Emma. At one point, you were one of the single most important people in my life. You were my family.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Emma sat there, staring at him, at their enclosed hands. She swallowed hard; but yet she couldn’t look away. Somehow they felt closer than they had before, as if the distance between them had shrunk but she didn’t remember moving, or noticing that he’d moved. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“And if you want, I’ll be there at the funeral.”</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“I wouldn’t want to ask too much of you.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>“It wouldn't be that much of an ask, Emma. Truly.” </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Even after all this time, through everything they’ve been through he still cared for him. He still wanted to be there for her and it broke her fucking heart because she knew she didn’t deserve it. Didn’t deserve him. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
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